Growing up in a competitive all boys school in the 1980s, I experienced the joy and pain of winning and losing almost on a daily basis. Everything in high school seemed to be some form of competition; from our grades, our extra-curricular activities, the girls we get to know, the strength of our muscles, the talents we have, the cool people we know. Now that I can look back at it, I realize that the sense of competition was often overwhelming and paralyzing. The fear of losing in a competition was often the reason I was not competing well. In some cases it was so intimidating that I decided not to participate in the competition all together against my own wishes.
50 years through life now, I am still fascinated by the merit and demerit of competition and what it means to our lives. I have been running my own business for six years in addition to the twenty years or so navigating a career path in a corporate environment. Competition is still a part of my life, but they are much less influential, much narrower than that of high-school. After all, I do not care anymore if anyone is more talented in music or more muscular than me. I can't be bothered by anyone's judgement about me. I care about making a nice home and family, doing things I like, staying healthy, keeping my friends and keeping my business running well. I compete only when I have to - mostly to grow my business, or when I am playing some form of sports.
I suppose if I can give an advise to the younger me in high-school, I
would have told him that he has been wearing the wrong lens to look at
life. I would have told him that winning and losing come a few steps
down after having fun, learning about things that interest me, making
friends and experiencing life as whole. But I wonder if the
younger me would have understood the advise, especially when many things in high school were measured and compared very regularly, if not by the school, by peer pressure.
Competition is a part of life, and it happens in nature. But there are fundamental differences between competition in nature, and competition as it is created by humanity. This is where all the problems started.
In nature competition happens briefly on important moments; like during the time when two lions are fighting to find the leader of the pack, or when two male birds competing for a mate. It is almost like a rite of passage for an order to be established. But the moment the winner is found, the competition is over and life resumes. Humans, on the other hand, have a believe that competition is needed all the time, in every part of our lives. It is believed to be the reason why societies move ahead. Records have to be broken all the time, not because they are important, but because they are measured and reported.
Competition
a-la humanity is perpetuated for the sake of rewards, mostly
measured by money. Just consider the media or social media, and how
they have to always create competition in their reporting. Russia vs.
USA vs China, capitalism vs socialism. The truth in real life is far from what is portrayed, because there is
no such thing as Russia vs. USA the way the media would like us to see
it. They are countries, not individuals. Russia and the USA have governments
who each has to find ways to manage the need of their people. Capitalism and socialism are governing systems, and they are extremely imperfect at their best. It is therefore puzzling that the media and world leaders seemed to be obsessed to prove the superiority of one from another instead of trying to make them work together.
Competition in nature is a moment to restore balance, while competition of human beings continue to create imbalance. A "winner" in business is measured by its growing sales numbers but not by its environmental pollution that it generated, or the well being that it created for the users, consumers, employees, environment. Because of this single sided approach to life, businesses have been behaving with unmitigated irresponsibility in the name of winning. That is why our modern way of life is hopelessly failing to resolve most pressing problems in our lives like hunger, poverty, pollution, inequality. We are in a system that promotes and rewards imbalance, and until it is changed, we are just not going to get better.
One may argue that competition has been good for humanity. Without competition, wouldn't we still be stuck in the dark ages? Would people like Albert Einstein to Steve Jobs be discovering and creating things if they are not competitive?
I would argue that competitiveness is a
part of human nature, just like testosterone is a part of human hormonal system. Competitiveness is useful, important, but it is not a singular way of living; just like testosterone
is not the only type of hormone that are working in our body. A healthy
body is a balanced body, where all the hormones are excreted at the right
amount and all the nerves are functioning at the right level of
sensitivity. If testosterone is the only hormone that is working in our body, we will not be a living being.
In the same manner, when humanity perpetuates competition and put it as the way to live, the world becomes a poor place. The race of nuclear warhead that has continued on since the end of world war II is one of the most insane situation that humanity has ever put itself into. Every single nuclear warhead that is produced means an increase of risk to our lives, but yet we are unable to collectively stop the race. We are trapped in an escalating self-destruct mode in the name of "winning".
This problem would have been funny if it is not so serious. If we feel the world is increasingly jittery, polarized, hostile and unsafe, it is because we are continuously in the competition mode. If the United States, China and Russia continue to see each other first as competitors and not as fellow mortals who try to find peace, then we can forget about any potential solutions to the world's biggest problems. Unfortunately the world leaders are still deep in the woods grappling in the dark while the forest is burning fast.Perhaps my advise to the younger me in high school applies to the world leaders too. Lower the mindset of winning and losing a few step down. Lets first try to understand, make new friends, keep our old friends and create a peaceful place to live in. Keep the competitiveness in check so that it does not take over our lives.
